Saying Yes.

I was feeling like I was beginning to become one of those moms.  You know the one I’m talking about.  The mom who always has a scowl on her face and who is constantly saying “no” to her children.  No, we don’t have time right now.  No, you just had a snack.  No, you can’t have candy, it’s 9 am.  No, I’m not buying you that toy, you just got a bunch of birthday presents.  No, it’s too messy.  No, I’m doing something else right now.  

No, No, No, No, NO!

I am so tired of hearing myself say no.  So very tired.

So I decided to do something about it.  I decided to make a conscious decision to say “Yes” more.  Even if it means a little more mess, and even if it means putting aside my oh so important agenda (note sarcasm).  Now, I realize that there are still many things that I’m going to have to say no to… like candy at 9 am, among other things.  But there are so many things that I can say yes to that I choose not to say yes to because they inconvenience me.  Are my children an inconvenience?  Is that what I’m saying?  That’s not how I want them to feel.  So I’m trying really hard to say yes more.  I don’t want to say that I’m trying to be a “Yes Mom” because I think that that connotes imbalance.  There needs to be balance.  That is what I wasn’t feeling.  I was feeling way too negative, and I didn’t like it one bit.  

I had this necklace made to remind me to be more positive with my children.  It stays close to my heart and gently speaks to me throughout the day when I feel an unnecessary no coming on.

What reminders could you use right about now?

My lovely necklace was made by Hello Cheeseburger on Etsy.com.  This is not a sponsored post, I just wanted to share the shop with you because I love my necklace so much.

Comments

  1. Jocelyn says:

    Love this! I feel the same way. I need that reminder to lighten up and just say yes to things more often. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Kellie Snyder says:

    Ugh, I totally get this. I’ve been trying to say yes more recently too. The other one that I find myself saying a lot is ‘not right now’. Except I say it all the time. I’m trying to say yes even if the answer to their specific question is no. Like if they ask for cookie after breakfast I can say, “Yes you may have a cookie, but not until after lunch”. Sometimes it’s just so much easier to say no. It requires so much less energy. But seriously, they’re our KIDS right?! What’s up with not wanting to spend energy on my kids? So, yes, more yeses!! :) And that necklace is pretty cool! I love having jewelry pieces that are reminder pieces. I have a couple and I love them.

    • I know exactly what you mean, Kellie! Not right now makes me feel just as bad as no! I’ve been trying to to put the yes spin on things too, to make my answers seem more positive. It is exhausting work, that is for sure, but an investment, right?

  3. Julie Hunt says:

    Great post! I teach this message often as a now “empty-nester” mom. So many questions my children asked got relegated to the “no” box simply because I was too busy, rushed, stuck in my list of to-dos or valued my schedule more than my child. Rarely did I take the time to thoughtfully ponder if indeed their question was actually doable. (hangs head) Fortunately I “course corrected” about a decade and a half ago, which gives my adult children (and me) great joy! We liked your post so much we shared it on our Facebook page today. :-)

    • Wow, Julie, thank you so much! I’m flattered! It really is a learning process, this parenting, isn’t it?

  4. Sara B says:

    Oh my, thank you! I just found your blog from one of the other Bold Beautiful You blogs. And boy – howdy this hit home. It’s a piece of advice my older sister gave me before I even had children, but I need reminding on a regular basis! Why not pull out the watercolors/play dough/_______. I think it’s funny how we all have our things that are easiest for us – I have no issue with them helping to cook so long as they’re not in danger – but as we don’t have a good dedicated play area (on the list to fix this year) I cringe when they want to paint. So – enough of the essay – thank you! I needed this today. :)

Speak Your Mind

*